From the Heart

Like I said last time, yesterday was my daughter’s third birthday and her party was a blast! At least for me it was. Last night when I was lying in bed next to my doll putting her to sleep, somehow I just couldn’t hold back my tears. All the memories – from the day she was born… to when she took her first steps… to when turned one… to when she called me ‘mamma’ for the first time… to when she became a big sister… all these beautiful memories kept flashing in front of my eyes. It was pitch dark in the room but I could see everything crystal clear. All I want is to imprint these special memories in my mind in such a way that they never fade. If only I could just pause the time, this is such a precious time of my life. My older one now communicates her feelings and showers us with hugs and kisses. If only I could bottle up her innocence and sweetness I totally would.
It’s very, very hard for me to put this love, this motherly feeling in words. I am BEYOND grateful to the almighty that I got to experience the gift of motherhood – not once but TWICE! So then, I picked up my phone and started typing everything I was feeling right then. I’ve never attempted at any such thing before, so here it goes –

आज क्या लिखूँ ..??

एक बेटी की आस थी
तब ज़िंदगी में तुम आई
नन्ही सी जान
लगा मानो घर भर गया
दिल को सुकून मिल गया
तुम्हारी बड़ी बड़ी आँखें..
प्यारी सी नाक़
सबने कहा अपने पापा पर गई हो
पायल पहने पुरे घर में दौड़ती थी

नजाने कब तुम इतनी बड़ी हो गई..
अब पटर पटर बोलती हो
कितने सवाल करती हो
मम्मा मम्मा कह पूरा दिन तंग करती हो
कभी अपना बेस्ट फ्रेंड बना लेती हो
और कभी रूठ जाती हो
फिर तुरन्त मान भी जाती हो

अपनी मासूमियत
और चंचल अदाओं से
सबको ख़ूब हसाती हो

तुम्हीं से तो है घर – घर मेरा
तुम्हीं तो मेरी परी हो
अपने पापा की गुड़िया और दादी की लाडो रानी
नानी की तो फुलझड़ी हो

और क्या लिखूँ…
वो शब्द नहीं बने
जो बता सकें
की तुम मेरे लिए क्या हो
बस ईश्वर का आशीर्वाद हो
मेरी प्यारी सी बेटी
मेरी Keva
तुम जियो हज़ारों साल
Happy birthday मेरी लल्ली ❤️

We clicked these pictures after my girl’s birthday party got over. I am surprised how well the saree held its shape and was actually a breeze through out the event. Of course I had to wear a saree! Another gift from dear mothership. Aren’t mothers just awesome! Thanks mom, love you.

From my Heart

Life with a baby is so unpredictable. Just when you think you know it all, and you are on the right track.. things go boom!!! There goes all your planning in the drain. As much as I love my sweet little bean, the unpredictability that comes with parenting is what I wasn’t ready or let’s say planned for! Every day is new. Every day comes with it’s own challenges. Every day she (and I) learn something new. Every day is different in our lives.
This bittersweet (but oh, so satisfying) experience, the struggles, the smiles, the tears, those cuddles, those long wakeful nights, and short playful days.. I want to absorb it all and cherish them deep in my heart forever since this time will never come back. She will never be a baby again. She keeps growing every minute, every second of the day. It feels like time is racing with me. And it’s such a delight to watch her personality unfold a little every day. I look at her and my eyes get watered so often, wondering how on earth is she mine! What did I ever do to get so lucky. I never get an answer back, so then I just thank the universe for making her mine. She is love. She is life. She is happiness. She is pure innocence.
I love her so.. my heart hurts.